Jumanji: The Next Level (2019)

In Jumanji: The Next Level, the gang is back but the game has changed. As they return to rescue one of their own, the players will have to brave parts unknown from arid deserts to snowy mountains, to escape the world's most dangerous game.

Jess' Review

Unlike the beloved classic from Robin Williams heyday, or even this film’s half-entertaining predecessor, Jumanji: The Next Level is not good. In fact, it’s pretty damn awful. And coming from someone who actively enjoys a bad movie, I’m disappointed that the filmmakers chose not to lean into the ludicrosity and make the best of a bad situation. Rather, it stands as yet another glitzy, money-grab going through the motions in a fruitless stab at action-comedy.

Jumanji’s star-studded cast returns for another whack at the modernised, monster-board game of old; conveniently brought together in a ‘real-world’ storyline that nobody particularly cares for. Let’s not pretend that the audience cares about Alex Wolff’s teenage insecurities and the precarious erosion of friendships - they just want to see The Rock throwing sh-t around. And whilst these emotional plot-lines are present, it’s almost an afterthought. An accessory to the action that swamps the majority of the film.

Despite a welcome injection of the legends that are Danny Glover and Danny DeVito - regrettably, underused and stifled by poor writing - The Next Level is nothing original. It follows the same path as Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, simply switching up baddies, environments and props to cover up the same, corny script. Whilst I didn’t think the first film was a total write-off, this film is trying too hard without putting in the effort. The Rock is The Rock with a hilariously bad New Jersey twist. Kevin Hart is ok, Karen Gillan is ok and Jack Black is ok too. As actors, the latter two are fantastic when given the appropriate tools, but here it’s a stale gimmick. Regrettably, the film isn’t even that funny.

Though the scenes of action are shiny and well-choreographed, I can’t help but shake a sense of pantomime when I watch Jumanji. Everything is a little bit over-the-top, and not in a good way. The script, the characters, the accents, even the pacing and haemorrhage of CGI. It’s all a blur of garish colours that might originally disarm a viewer into thinking it’s fun and exciting, only to realise the dye has bled out, amalgamated and stained everything a gross shade of brown. My point being, this isn’t good and it’s simply not worth your time.

3/10

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Sam's Review

We are introduced to Eddie, played by the wonderful Danny DeVito, grandfather to the film’s pseudo-lead Spencer (Alex Wolff). There’s a foolish part of me that feels a renewed hope. Surely an actor of DeVito’s calibre wouldn’t commit to a film unless it held a certain quality, right? And then Dwyane ‘The Rock’ Johnson came onto screen.

Jumanji, the mystical game, has evolved with the times, from a board game into a videogame. Characters are transported from the real world into their game characters. So, when DeVito’s Eddie is accidently transferred into the game, becoming the Bravestone avatar, we’re subjected to Johnson’s bizarre attempt at sounding like DeVito. It’s an insane distraction. It starts as a caricature of a New York accent, but fluctuates wildly. And at certain points, the dialogue lacks emotion, because instead of hitting the right inflections, Johnson is focused on getting the accent correct. Which he doesn’t. The accent offended me so much that I stopped the film and walked off during a scene involving ostriches. I mean, the highest paid actor in the world? Really?! He’s a phenomenal movie star, I guess. But as an actor… I have neither the energy or the word count to express my dismay at Hollywood, Johnson’s acting abilities, what we consider acting, ‘blockbuster’ films and what people consider good. He doesn’t deserve to be classed as an actor, really. Let alone make hundreds of millions?! I mean… Ugh.

Being transported into a video game and having to complete levels at the risk of your own death is a great concept. The problem is, there is little arc. Jumanji misses the chance to create a fun game. Instead, it becomes a jumble of hectic scenes where they dash from one incident to the next, with very little in the way of strategy. It attempts to be clever by subverting the typical tropes that come with the ‘action genre’. Muscle-bound, over the top violence. Smouldering looks into the distance. Tacky one-liners. You know, all the stuff Johnson is known for. No, no… I’ll behave. Except, instead of ridiculing it, it embraces it. So much potential squandered. Instead of a smart, witty, genre-bending film, that should’ve been the goal of the filmmakers, it’s everything is it attempting to mock.

There is little in the way of redemption. Jack Black? He is a gem who must be protected at all costs. DeVito has more talent than most of the cast combined. And Alex Wolff has a bright future ahead of him.

The writing is bland, the story is flat. There’s little point in finishing this with a witty line about the film being rubbish. The filmmakers didn’t try, why should I?

2/10